i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
