Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way

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(301): View more from Maryland

not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(519): View more from Ontario

You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.

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(619): View more from California

Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.

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(210): View more from Texas

Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.

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(540): View more from Virginia

At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.

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