guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
