remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
