yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize