Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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