Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.