So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
did i walk over a car last night?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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