do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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