did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
