I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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