I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize