the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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