rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
