He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize