How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
