We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
