Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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