spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
