Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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