Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
