So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
