He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Couch. On fire.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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