Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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