i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
