Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
