You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize