the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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