STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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