Don't make out with my wife yet
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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