I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
BRING THE BAGELS
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize