I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
