Texts From Last Night

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  (352): View more from Florida

  dude they were twins that means they were both only 17

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  (352): dude they were twins that means they were both only 17 http://tfl.nu/sodj
  Replies (36) Good night (5121) Bad night (1817)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?

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  (901): How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games? http://tfl.nu/94zu
  Replies (14) Good night (4319) Bad night (850)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.

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  (440): I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill. http://tfl.nu/321p
  Replies (2) Good night (2498) Bad night (1120)
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  (+49): View more from Germany

  The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?

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  (+49): The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed? http://tfl.nu/pvwt
  Replies (8) Good night (3991) Bad night (1372)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder

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  (203): They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder http://tfl.nu/slwo
  Replies (4) Good night (1822) Bad night (866)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.

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  (602): You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up. http://tfl.nu/1td0
  Replies (4) Good night (2017) Bad night (1377)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.

  (1-269): View more from Michigan

  I just wanted to decorate you...

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  (269): It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair. (1-269): I just wanted to decorate you... http://tfl.nu/gax7
  Replies (8) Good night (3598) Bad night (828)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.

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  (+44): Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife. http://tfl.nu/3wb9
  Replies (11) Good night (862) Bad night (2373)
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  (858): View more from California

  I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.

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  (858): I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling. http://tfl.nu/biin
  Replies (10) Good night (1413) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished 

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  (916): I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished  http://tfl.nu/f0m1
  Replies (7) Good night (972) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..

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  (209): I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him.. http://tfl.nu/g4nz
  Replies (3) Good night (1106) Bad night (585)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.

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  (440): I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me. http://tfl.nu/twlr
  Replies (6) Good night (716) Bad night (1235)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.

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  (615): How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long. http://tfl.nu/h6mm
  Replies (16) Good night (1261) Bad night (475)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.

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  (520): dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first. http://tfl.nu/2u4z
  Replies (32) Good night (425) Bad night (1321)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."

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  (401): Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel." http://tfl.nu/en31
  Replies (0) Good night (697) Bad night (171)

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