we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
