Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
