is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
