Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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