Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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