Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The Olympian is in my bed
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