Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
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I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
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since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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