I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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