margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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