i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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