Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize