So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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