so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
