How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Randomize
