This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
