Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
