I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
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