Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
